After that it was pretty much quiet in the Counsel room where I had to stay because everyone was pretending that they were all here to protect me. It was all a trap and I wish we had some of the games I had brought to keep us occupied. Mark and Francois were busy pretending to tell everyone I was here. Stella was chatting away trying to keep my mind off of what was really going on. Nancy was just sitting in her chair looking lost. Nemus was just sitting there as well, but he looked a little nervous and a little like he was scheming. It was another half hour before Mark and Francois came in from "spreading the word of my arrival" to stay with us until the end of this. They both looked like someone had just died.
    It was then that I noticed how close to Nemus that I was. I couldn't sit there for any longer, not if I was to keep from giving something away. 
    "Is it hot in here?" I asked the general public and got out of my chair. The plan was for me to go over and open the door and then sit in the chair in between Mark and Francois. Was being the key word because the moment I got out of my chair, Nemus reached over the table and grabbed my arm. It took me a moment to understand what was going on, and before I could do anything, Nemus had me by both arms in front of him. 
    Francois seemed to know what was going on right away because the moment Nemus had touched me, I heard him draw his sword. Francois had pulled it out of the sheath so fast the I could hear it cut through the air and take aim at Nemus. Or me if you wanted to be specific because there was no way of getting to Nemus without going through me. Everyone else reacted at the same time after that. Stella and Nancy stumbled into the far corner of the room and Mark stood up so fast that he knocked his chair over. He moved to stand in front of Stella and Nancy, but my guess was that he was more interested in protecting Stella than Nancy. 
    There was a pregnant silence and Nemus whispered "now" from behind me. I knew exactly what he was talking about and I felt myself go cold and pale. That was truly and oh shit moment if there ever was one. Francois seemed to hear this too because he paled a little too.
     We all stood very still, not daring to move.  
 
It was dangerous for all of us to be in such a small proximity when Francois was holding a sword an out for blood. Nemus’s in particular, but you could never really be sure how things were going to turn out when Francois had something pointy in his hand with is spastic movements and all. I found myself trusting him completely.
            Nemus’s cold hands were holding me in front of him, a meat shield. He stunk and his clammy hands were like steal vices around my upper arms. I was going to be sick. Even thinking about Nemus touching me made gag and if was much worse than I could have ever imagined.
            “Kill her.’ Nemus was shouting. “Kill her and get it over with, Steve.”
            “Please, no.” I was trying really hard not to cry. “I don’t want to die.” My eyes were tearing up, even though I was blinking as hard as I could. I really didn’t want to cry or beg, not if it wasn’t going to help me save my life. That wasn’t the way I wanted to go, if I had to go.
            Francois was looking helpless, so I tried my best not to look at hi. Mark and Stella didn’t look anymore helpful and Nancy was just standing in the corner looking spooked. Looking at their faces wasn’t going to help. I took several deep breaths and closed my eyes.
            “Nemus.” My voice came out so even that it even scared me a little. Who knew I could be so calm under pressure? “You haven’t done anything we can’t forgive yet.” This is what all the cops said on T.V. and I hoped that it would talk Nemus down from killing me. “We can still fix this and no one has to die.”
            Nemus didn’t respond. I hoped that he was thinking about letting me go, but instead of loosening his grip he tightened it. There was going to be bruises there, if I survived long enough to let them form. I was beginning to believe that Nemus wasn’t going to let himself be talked out of this, no matter how pretty of words I used or how forgiving I promised to be.
            “No.” He said and I could hear in his voice that he was not going to back down from his plan. “Steve.” Nemus barked and turned me so I was angled toward Francois. I opened my eyes to meet his; I knew I was going to die. Ghostly hands wrapped around my neck and started to squeeze. This in turn started to cut off my air ways. Things were starting to get fuzzy around the edges and Francois was starting to move.
            It was a little disconcerting how everything slowed down. I was really going to die; I started to make that connection in my head. As much as I thought that I wasn’t afraid to die, I was. I was afraid and this hurt so much!
            Suddenly, I was jerked to one side as Nemus pushed me away from him. There was a strange burning in one of my shoulders that I couldn’t make sense of. I was being strangled, and the pain should be in my neck, not my shoulder. Francois also looked pained, but he started to move again in the opposite direction of me. Black spots were beginning to appear in front of my vision and my knees were turning into rubber. Without Nemus holding me in place, I stumbled into a corner and dropped to me knees.
            Mark rushed over and it appeared that he was grappling with something. Steve, my brain made the connection after a moment. Mark was trying to save me from Steve. For a moment the ghost hands came off of my throat and I started to gasp for air. The black spots lightened and my eyes focused just enough to see Francois run Nemus through the stomach.
            As blood started to gush out of Nemus’s wound, I gagged and turned away. The smell was worse now. Nemus started to moan and it soon became very clear that he was in a lot of pain. It served him right, but I couldn’t make any sense of what was happening at the time. I never knew that Zombies bled before now. How very odd that Nemus should be laying on the floor gushing blood like he had a pulse to push it out of his body.
            I vaguely wondered if Francois was having flash backs of his duel with Emile over Henrietta. Was I worth killing for? I wondered this as Steve’s hands closed around my wind pipe and cut off my air once again. All of this fighting and I was still going to die. None of this had helped besides now both Nemus and I were going to die instead of just one of us.
            Francois was screaming something at Nemus, his calm lying shattered on the ground beside him, that I didn’t understand. Mark was still trying to fight off Steve and save me. Stella and Nancy were frozen in the corner, watching in horror as I slowly and painfully died. These were the last things that I was going to see. This was the last time I would probably see any of them, and I was sad. This was it. Damn, I was going to die a virgin.
            Afterwards, when I thought back on all of this it seemed funny that particular thought had even crossed my mind. It didn’t belong with any of the other thoughts that were buzzing around my brain. I would blame it on the lack of oxygen to my brain and being so afraid and never tell anyone about it. Too embarrassing, but the thought told me that I wasn’t ready to die just yet. There was too much in life, weather that be with normal humans or Zombies, which I hadn’t done yet, and I found the strength inside me to start thrashing around. I tried to claw at Steve’s hands, but I think I ended up hurting myself more than I had ever hurt him.
            All at once, the pressure at my neck was gone. I looked around to see what was going on. Beyond Mark, Francois was holding a bloody sword in one hand and panting very hard. His face was splattered in blood and his blond hair turned dark with swear. He had driven his sword through Nemus’s heart and killed him. Francois had fought hard to kill Nemus, who must have been stronger than I had ever given him credit for.
            “Be gone ghost, your master is dead now.” Francois said and I felt Steve leave. This was done with and I wasn’t dead. It might have just been that I was going in to shock, but I started to laugh. Laughing hurt quite a bit, especially in my shoulder, but I couldn’t stop. I was going to live.
            Even Francois smiled over to me as he dropped to his knees. He was exhausted I thought. I reached up to inspect my hurting shoulder. When I pulled my hand away, there was warm blood on my finger tips. My blood.
            “Oh.” I said as I finally understood the burning and pain. Francois had accidentally stabbed me when he was trying to save me. “I’m hurt.” I heard Francois rasp out a laugh from across the room.
            “That’s one way to put it, Majesty.” He was still lying on the floor.
            Mark came over and looked at my shoulder. “You’ll need a doctor.” He said gravely. “But you’ll live.” Those were the most comforting three words that I had ever heard. I’d live. Hearing Mark say them made them real, even though I knew that I was not going to die before Mark had told me.
            “Are you okay, Francois?” I asked next.
            “Nothing that won’t heal.”
            “Nancy? Stella?”
            Stella found her voice first, and it came out shaky. “We’re fine.” She called from their corner.
            “Why would Nemus do this?’ Nancy was muttering. Even though she had hated me, she had never even thought about killing me.
            None of us had an answer and before I could think of one, Antony and Erica walked through the doors into the battle ground.
            They both paused in the door way, not knowing quite what to do. Antony was the first to come to his senses and rush over to me. Mark was already pressing the shreds of Nemus’s shirt on to my shoulder to make the bleeding stop, so all Antony could do was ask me if I was alright.
            “Just peachy.” I smiled. “But perhaps you could go fetch someone to stitch me up?”
            Antony was out the door like a bullet from a gun. Erica was still standing in the doorway a little more than stunned.
            “We had an emergency.” I told her. “Nemus was the one trying to kill me. Francois killed him.” It was strange to say it out loud. Strange to say it so matter of factly.
            “Nemus is dead?” Erica asked to clarify. I nodded and pointed to the body, which still lay where Francois had left it. She couldn’t quite hide he happiness.
            It wasn’t long before Antony brought a doctor and I was hauled to my room. I don’t remember much after that because I think I must have passed out on the way there. The pain was unbearable when I was being moved.    
            When I woke up, I was in my bed lying on my back. The covers were pulled up to my chin, and from the rough feeling of cotton on my skin I had the feeling that the doctor had had to take my shirt off to get to the wound. Lovely.
            “Is Francois okay?” I asked without even looking to see if someone was there, because someone had to be there.            
            “I’m fine.” Came Francois’ beautiful baritone voice from the corner of the room. He must be sitting at my desk from where his voice was coming from.
            “Good. I’d hate for my most valiant knight to die, and over something as stupid as an assassination attempt, how silly.” I tried to make light of the situation, but I really was glad that he was doing okay. “How long have I been asleep?”
            “About a day.” Francois got out of his chair and handed me a shirt off the floor when he saw me sitting up. My shoulder started to sting and I let out all the breath that I had in my lungs in a hiss through gritted teeth. “Take it easy, that wasn’t a shallow wound.” His voice sounded apologetic.
            As I started to try and sit up again Francois slid his arm under my shoulders and helped. He also had to help me put my shirt on because it was all I could do to keep from crying as I raised my arm above my head.
            In movies and books they never tell you what happens after the hero has been seriously hurt. They never tell you how much it hurts to survive being stabbed and strangled, and it seriously sucked. It was slightly embarrassing too because you couldn’t dress yourself and the only other person in the room was a guy.
            “Thanks, Francois.” I said as I got out of bed. “You know, for saving my life and everything.”  
           "It's my job." Francois gave an awkward little shrug. "What else was I supposed to do, let you die?"
       There was nothing to be done with him, he just didn't get it. He could have let me die. "Nemus seemed more than happy to let me die." I told him.
    "I am certainly not Nemus." He sounded a little offended that I would even think to compare him to the snake that was Nemus. Maybe he should have been too; it was not a nice thing to say about anyone.
    "You certainly are not.' I agreed and then turned my head to look at him. Jesus Christ Almightily in Heaven that hurt. "Would you hand me a mirror please?" There were going to be bruises in the shape of Steve's fingers all over my neck, and several claw marks from when I decided that I did not want to die just yet.
    "I'm not sure you want to see." Francois said it, but he still got out of his chair and brought the hand mirror to my bed. I noticed how slowly he moved, he must still be in some pain too. How sweet of him to come and watch over me. I wondered if he was doing it because he liked me or because he thought that it was his duty to protect me as I took the mirror from his hand.
    Raising it so that I was able to see the reflection of my neck I saw that Francois had been right. Maybe it would have been better if I had never looked in the mirror. There would be no covering this up with makeup, not even stage make up. Scarves and turtle necks would be the only answer for school and in front of my parents. Down here I wouldn't bother. Two clear hand prints wee visible around my neck and several fingers too. The scratches that I had left were a deep angry red and puckered. It was not a pretty sight. I wondered how Francois kept from cringing when he looked at it.
    "I should go tell everybody I'm okay." I sighed and started to get out of bed. 
    "I don't think that you're well enough, Majesty." Francois said and tried to gently push me back to the pillows. 
    "Do you know what un phallocrate means, Francois?' I sighed. He looked stunned for a moment.
    "It means 'a male chauvinist pig'." Francois told me. Another phrase Kara had taught me.
    "Yeah, well you're being one. Stop it." I pushed his hands away from me and got out of bed. I looked even worse in the full length mirror. A hairbrush and make up helped a little, even though I skipped the make up on my neck. "Where are they?' I asked Francois.
    "In Mark and Stella's room." He was still frowning at me. Truth be told, he was probally right because I was a little light headed, but I was never going to tell him that. 
    We met with everyone and they were all glad to see that I was alright, especially Erica. There were gentle hugs, and even those hurt my arms. I had completely forgotten about the bruises that Nemus had left on my arms. Even Nancy got up and told me how glad that she was that I was alright. That was a little surprising, but at least I knew she wasn't going to flip out and pull a Nemus any time soon.
    As I went to sit down in a chair that Mark had brought for me, I stumbled slightly. Francois caught me by my elbow just in time to stop me from falling. He steadied my for a moment and then helped me in to the chair.
    "Has anyone come to a decision about what to do with Nemus's body?' It was hard to talk about, but I needed some closure on this and this was the only way I was going to get it.
    "We were going to burn in, Majesty." Nancy said from her corner. "That's how we always deal with traitors." I wondered how hard it was for her to say this as Nemus seemed to be the only one who had shared her dislike for me.
    "Alright." I nodded. Without a body he wouldn't be able to hurt me anymore. "Has anything been said to the citizens?" Not that I knew what the reaction to that would be, but I thought that I should know.
    "No." Mark said. "I don't think any specifics will be mentioned, but we will tell them that Nemus was a traitor."
    "How will they take that?"
    "Some will be angry, but most will be glad that he did not hurt you." Francois said from my side. "He was not very popular."
    There were a few other things that we discussed, but at the end I was too tired to pay any attention to that. I only had one more question to ask, and then I would be off to bed again. Who knew that almost being killed would take so much out of you?
    "When do you think that I can go home again?" I really wanted to see my family and give them all great big hugs. Near death experiences have a way of changing a person and giving them perspective.
    "In a few days, I think the doctor said." Mark said. "We want to make sure that you won't have any complications that you can’t explain you way out of." How thoughtful of them.
    "I think I'm going to go to bed then, if there's nothing else you need from me." No one spoke up, so I stood and opened the door. Francois was right behind me, and when he offered me his arm in the hall I took it without complaint.
    "Lucy, wait." Erica called out from just inside the door. She must have been having trouble getting through the mass of people that had congregated inside Mark and Stella's room. Once she caught up we started to slowly walk down the hallway towards my room, with me still clinging to Francois to keep from falling on my ass.
    "You sure you're all right, Lucy?" Erica asked me.
    "Yeah, just a little tired from the whole thing. I'll be up to a hundred percent in a few days." Francois walked silently behind us.
    "If you need anything just ask, okay? Don't be all hard headed about this."
    "I'm clinging to Francois just to stay on my feet; do you think I have that option?" I asked Erica.
    She laughed a little bit. "I guess not." Erica must have been a little relieved to know that I was going to be fine.
    Erica left us at my door, but Francois walked in with me. He had to because I was still holding on to his arm for support. After helping me back into bed, Francois took his post in the desk chair he had positioned by the door, except that he had moved it by the head of my bed. Like where people sit when they're visiting a sick person in the hospital. I was so tired, but I had one question that I just had to ask Francois before I fell asleep.
    "Was I worth killing for, Francois?"
    "Absolutely." He smiled at me and sat back in his chair.
    That was the first night since I found out about Steve that I dared to sleep with my door unlocked and a window open. The night air was cool and smelt of rain. I slept the best I had since the day on the tour of the realm in what Zombie time would be around a month ago.

The next morning was hell, and so was school. The only thing that I was living for, and not going home sick for, was Zombie Land waiting for me just a couple hundred yards away from the school. I could do this, I repeated over and over again in my head. Imagine how disappointed I was when I left school and was met by Francois telling me he didn't want me down in Zombie Land today. For my safety he said, but I was too mad to care. He offered to walk me home, but I refused. I started towards the bus, which had pulled away by the time I got there, and Francois was following me. 
    Groaning at my bad luck, I turned around to face Francois. 
    "This is all your fault." I told him, putting my hands on my hips.  "Now I have to walk home."  
    "I'm sorry. I'll walk you." I really wanted to turn him down, but I hated walking home alone, so I let him. Francois was even so nice as to carry my heavy ass backpack home for me too.
    When we got to my house, Mom was still at work and Dad had run off on some errand. Tom wasn't home, but that was nothing new. I invited Francois in, and he agreed. 
    "Is there any particular reason I can't go today?' I asked because I knew it was the only chance I was going to have. 
    "It's all part of my plan to figure out who's trying to kill you." Francois said, but didn't elaborate.
    "Which is?" I asked after a minute of waiting. 
    "I can’t' tell you. It would ruin the plan." I felt a little bit of paranoia take over right then. What was he doing without me knowing? Was it something bad? It was quite similar to the feeling I got the last time that he wouldn’t let me go to Zombie Land 'for my own protection'. 
    "I Mark in on this?" I asked skeptically.    
    "Yes." Francois nodded and then pulled my math book out of my bag. "Shall we?" He asked sitting down at the kitchen table. 
    "Fine." I sighed knowing that I wasn't going to get anywhere with the conversation we were having. It was a little bit of a comfort to know that Mark was in on this too. He seemed to be the level headed one of the two, or at least the one who was more in line with what I wanted and how I wanted to rule then Francois was. 
    After about ten minutes of arguing the finer points of statistics, which Francois was right about but I wouldn't admit, my Dad came home and stared at the Zombie sitting at our kitchen table. He would never believe me if I told him what Francois really was, but he would laugh and tell me that I should stop taking the things I read in those fantasy novels too seriously. Dad always took everything in stride. 
    "Hey, you must be Lucy's math tutor." Dad said and left the room. Presumably to go watch T.V. in the room next to the one Francois and I were studding in. 
    "I should go now." Francois said a little after that. I didn't argue, if he needed to leave there was no way I could contest that. It wasn't like I was allowed to know Francois' awesome plan. 
    After school the next day, Francois also showed up telling me that he wanted me to stay top side. In fact, that was the last time I saw him until Friday. He had told me to stay away until he came and got me and that day was Friday. I was so happy that I hugged Francois and pulled him all the way to the big fucking hole. He looked glum and like he was about to do something very painful, not that I really noticed until later. 
    We walked down the hallway to the Counsel room in silence, which was a little nerve racking because I still wanted to know Francois' plan. He hadn't mentioned hide or hair of it since I had asked him about it. Francois was also walking very fast; my short legs almost couldn't keep up. If he was nervous about this, how should I be feeling? Scared? Was someone going to try and kill me? Did Francois think that they would be able to save me if someone did?
    When we entered the Counsel room, everybody was already there, including Stella which was a first. Apparently, Mark and Francois thought that we would need all the people thinking on this as we could get. He had even included Nemus and Nancy, who I had not seen in forever. I sat down in my chair, and as everybody looked at me, I looked between Francois and Mark. They were the ones with the plan. 
    "There’s been a ghost following Her Majesty." Francois suddenly began. Hearing him call me "Majesty" again was strange after him calling me Lucy for so long. I think that I preferred Lucy.
    "We think someone is going to try and kill her.' Mark continued. Hearing it come out of his mouth made everything much more real and I felt a pit start to grow in my stomach. This was really real, and there was nothing I could do about it. I hated feeling helpless, but that's what I was. With the Vampire conflict, I went and spoke to people and had at least some control. With the Dead Fetuses I could at least work on something while we had put a temporary patch on the thing. Here there was nothing I could do because I didn't have any understanding of anything that was going on. I didn't even understand why anyone would want to kill me. 
    "I don't know what to do but try and draw the killer out. We'll have to make it very public that she's heard and hope that the killer does something stupid."
    "Haven't your spies picked anything up about this, Francois?" Nancy asked from her corner. Francois shook his head in dismay.
    "Nothing. They’re still listening, but it seems that the guilty party knows our every move; we must do something they would never expect. That's why we must put the Queen in danger. I don't like it, but what else are we to do? Leave her in the human world?" 
    "No." Nancy said. "That wouldn't work. She's useless to us up there." It seemed as though as much as Nancy disagreed with me, she didn't want to kill me. That was a relief. The look in Francois' eyes showed that he was mentally checking her off the list of suspects that he had made in his head. Then he shot a glance at Nemus, another suspect on his list. I assumed that he was near the top too, because he was one of the few people that had met me and hated me. People like Derik, Elise, and Sam were off the list because when they had met me Steve was already following me. You never knew about the Vampires, but I really didn't think that sending an assassin to kill the Queen was really their style, not after meeting Antony, and if they had I think that they would have called Steve off by now. Erica had only spoken good things about him.  
    I suddenly got what Francois and Mark were planning. They weren't going to make it public that I was here and available to kill, they were going to try and trick Nemus into killing me because that was the only way they were ever going to catch him. Great, I was the bait in a plan that might get me killed and no one had even been polite enough to ask for my permission. There was nothing that I could do but hope this was going to end well, because what could I do? Tell Francois there was no way in hell that I was going to go through with this? If I said anything now we would never catch him and I would never get out of this alive, because there wasn't any doubt left in my mind that Nemus was trying to use Steve to kill me. 
    "I think that we should write to Antony and ask for help." This suggestion was met with nods from everyone but Nemus who frowned. "We're going to need all the help we can get if someone is trying to kill me."
    "I still don't trust the Vampire, Majesty." Nemus said hesitantly. Of course you don't you worthless little weasel I thought back, but didn't dare say it out loud, I had to let Francois go through with his plan.
    "I do, and that's really all that matters. We need their help and I'm not going to take chances with my life. Are you?" There was no way he could say yes to that with out risking his own neck and Nemus was too much of a coward to do that.
    "I just fell that..." Nemus was still trying to argue.
    "I'm over ruling you, Nemus. We're sending for help." The matter was closed after that and the letter was sent within a half hour. I was a little bit worried at how long it was going to take Antony and his soldiers to arrive and if it was too late, but there wasn't much I could do about that but hope for the best. 

    The ride north was a little better than the one we had from the palace. my ass hurt a little less because of a handy little tid bit I had picked up from watching the others ride, and that was stand up in the stirrups every once in a while. My ass thanked me for it. The scenery didn't change much though. It still looked like northern Minnesota, even though Mark said that we were starting to get up into the mining country. The ground started to get rocky, but big deal. It's not like the rest of the path smooth.
    We had ridden until noon and mark decided that we should stop and eat something. Lunch was uneventful in events and food. Fruit, like always. It seemed that they lacked totally imagination when it came to feeding me. God damn, give me a pot and a stove and I’ll bring my own food to make. It was getting a little sickening just eating fruit all of the time, and salads. They were good but really.
    After lunch we rode for a couple more hours and then up to an inn. I assumed that that was where we were going to stay, and I was right. A couple guys came forward and took our horses. Francois took my bag before I could do anything about it, and started inside. I stared at him for a moment, thinking about what a freak he was and then I realized that he was just doing it as he was raised to. He had been raised as a gentleman and I guess that meant that he took girls' bags for them, even if they were perfectly capable of doing it themselves. I stalked after Mark and Francois, indignant that I was being treated like a five year old who couldn't carry a pound of sugar. So not true.
    This hotel/inn thing was just as nice as the last one we stayed in. The key was an old fashioned one and Francois took the spare just like last time. I didn't really pay attention to what the room looked like, because I didn't really care. I pulled out a book and headed downstairs to hand out with Stella and Mark, who were standing around a billiards table. Not being particularly good at any form of billiards game, I turned down any offer to play. I just sat in the corner and read, occasionally stopping to watch the game.
    Billiards was one of my weird pass times, not playing but watching. It was on ESPN every once in a while, usually when nothing else was on because of lack of programming, and I watched it. Never enough to know the player, but enough to know all the rules and technicalities.
    Mark won their first game, and in the middle of the second Francois walked in the room. He was also carrying a book, something in French that I couldn't read. No way of knowing what he was reading unless I asked. Damn, I hated asking people that. It was so weird when people took it the wrong way and thought that you were more interested in them than their book, and ninety percent of the time, that wasn't true for me. With François it was a fifty-fifty split, I wanted to know what he was reading and get to know a little more about him. It was hard just to ask him, because it seemed to make Zombies a little uncomfortable when people asked them about themselves. Maybe there was some code of conduct that I was misinformed on, but it seemed rude to ask anyone about themselves.
    I had asked Francois a couple questions that one time, but he had told me that it was rude to do so when I was asking. The only reason he had put up with that was because I was queen and he had to. He hadn't really asked me any in return either. No one had really asked me about myself since I had first come here, which I was just starting to notice. How strange was it that I considered all of these people nice and perhaps my friends, but I didn't really know anything about them?
    We spent a few more hours in the billiards room before we went to dinner. I ended up not asking Francois about his book. Dinner was pretty much the same as it had been at the other inn, a nice break from fruit and salads. There wasn't any meat in my food though, for which I was glad.
    After dinner I went up to my room, escorted by Francois under Mark's insistence, and read some more. It was still weird to be alone, but not too weird if I didn't think about it. Around nine I took a bath and went to bed, falling into an almost coma when I hit the pillows.
    For once since finding out about Steve I slept all the way through the night without dreaming about dying. It was quite restful, but I didn’t think that I would be getting to many more nights like that one until this was figured out.
    It a little after sun up when Francois came to wake me up. I was still sleeping when he opened the door and shook me awake. It took me a moment to figure out what was going on, and then when I did figure out who was waking me up, I panicked.    
    "What’s wrong?' I asked, panic clear to even me in my voice.
    "Nothing." Francois looked at me like I was being a freak. "It's time for breakfast."
    "Oh." I said and sat up, pushing my hair out of my face. "I slept." I said it like it was a strange habit to have.
    "Well?' Francois was setting a tray of something on the table in the corner.
    "Yes." I didn't have to lie about it.
    "That's good. I’ll leave you here to eat." Francois smiled and left the room. I wondered if he was standing just outside the door, or if he had really left me alone to eat. If he was standing outside the door there was no reason for him to stand there, he could just stay in the room with me while I ate. I sighed at Francois' particularities and went to see what he had brought me for food.
    I felt a little bit like an inmate being brought meals in my cell than a Queen being brought breakfast in bed.
    "Waffles." I said happily; glad to be rid of the oatmeal. That and waffles were one of my favorite breakfast food, not that Francois would know that because he had never asked. If Francois was outside of the door though, he could probably tell that waffles were my favorite by the tone in my voice. Or he was still in range of reading my thoughts like the little freaking Jedi that he was.
    God these waffles were good. What was with the Zombies being so good at cooking? Like the cupcake, it was like a party in my mouth. The moment I thought that, I tried to take it back, but my brain wouldn't let me. Nope, it said, you've already thought it and there's no going back now honey. I hated it when my mind used pet names for me; it just seemed to be pointless to me.
    Pulling on my shirt, I stuck the last bit of my toast into my mouth. The jam that had been spread on it tasted like it was home made, and was obviously strawberry. I wore another black t-shirt and jeans combo today as too keep all my good clothes from getting dirty. Who cared if I came out covered in coal dust, as long as I was wearing something that everyone, except for maybe Stella, seemed to think was ready for the trash. After getting dressed, I went into the bathroom and brushed my hair and then my teeth. It hurt a little to pull the brush through all of the knots that I had acquired from the previous night of sleep. It was a little embarrassing to have known that Francois had seen me like that.
    I even had a knot at the bottom of one shoulder blade from sleeping in the same strange position last night for too long. It was a little painful, but I was happy to have it as reassurance that I had slept. Smiling, I opened my door and paused, Francois was not outside my door. I was so sure that he was going to be there that it was a little weird that he wasn't there. Francois had really left me alone to eat, I wonder if mark had yelled at him about that or he had just noticed that he was being creepy.
    Walking downstairs, I decided not to give it too much thought. That would only get my thoughts going in circles and banging inside my head, giving me a headache. Everyone was still in the dinning room of the hotel, their plates empty, thank god. I wondered how long they had been done, and if they were waiting for me. Everyone was there and when I stepped into the room they all turned to look at me.
    "What’s happening?' I asked, wishing that I had said something a little less embarrassing that that.
    "We were just going over the day’s itinerary." Mark said. "Please sit down and we go over it with you."
    "Okay." My knack for saying dumb things seemed to be on the down, but I still wasn't clear.
    "We were going to go to the mine for a few hours, take a tour and everything, and then come back here for lunch." Mark suddenly made a little waving motion, and it took me a moment to realize that he was waving away who ever was on their way to bring me food. Thank Jesus Almighty.
   The mine was pretty cool. I liked the caves and shit. It was really dark and I couldn't see two inches in front of my face with the lights off. Other than that and tripping over my feet a few times it was pretty cool. They mined iron down there and I guess it did pretty well, but it was no where near as good of an export as the timber slightly to the south. Francois had to grab me by the elbow a few times to keep me from slipping on the wet stone and iron platforms that we walked on. The guy who gave us the tour was really nice, and he answered all of Mark's questions in the shortest way possible. It was awesome, because some of those questions that Mark asked could have been really boring.
    After the tour the guide took us to see the finished product and the place where they took it from pig iron to steel. It was kind of cool because while we were in the forgery the guy who worked there gave me a sword. Not that I had any practical use for the sword, but it was a nice gesture. And François looked impressed, so I assumed that it was a nice sword. He helped me belt it around my waist and showed me how to get it out of the sheath. While he was doing this I tried to say all the sword and fencing words I knew to try and impress someone. It didn't seem to work. I even swore that Francois started to shake his in shame. Great, there I went again, embarrassing myself.
    At least the guy who had given me the sword didn't look at me like that. It would have made everything tem times worse. He would have a good story to tell all of his friends about how stupid the new queen was when I left. And mark and Francois would laugh about it later when I wasn't around. It was all that I could do to keep them from laughing at me in front of me. The joys of being a stupid human girl acting as Queen for a land full of Zombies who were going to take every chance they could to laugh at me.
    I was glad that we went back to the hotel for lunch because after the mine, I was really tired. And hungry. Lunch was a simple salad, and after that Francois rushed me back to my room to pack. Apparently, we had to leave right away so we could get to the next stop before dark. Francois really didn't want to camp out. No communing with nature for these weary travelers.
    Suddenly, I found myself wondering if the animals down here were Zombie animals. Would they be hungry for my flesh? It wasn't long after that that I was on the floor of my room in a fit of giggles. The very thought of Zombie Squirrels attacking me was just too much. I could picture it clearly in my head.
    A tent, one of those green a-frame numbers, would be pitched in a picturesque meadow with wild flowers and all of that other dumb crap. The clouds would be fluffy, the birds would be singing, and the sky would be bright blue. It would truly be one of those movie perfect days that everyone pictured at some point or another. Mark and Francois would be cooking or killing something for dinner, which I would not be eating. Stella would be sewing something, because I don't know what else she was good at. I would be sitting on the ground, reading or something less useful than Stella, because that's what I did. Make a fool of myself and nothing beneficial. It would be a perfect evening, and just as we were all getting ready to retire for the night, the first squirrel of the evening would appear. 
    I would think that it was cute and coo at it. Then I would try to shoo it away because it was a little creepy that it kept staring at me. Francois would come and try to shoo it away too, mostly to protect me, and partly because he was a gentleman. Then I would notice that the squirrel had red eyes and I would shriek and push Francois in front of me because if I was going to die I wanted somebody to go first. Francois would pull out his sword and then the rest of the squirrels would advance.
    There would be hundreds of them, squirrels as far as the eye could see. With their screaming, beady, red, little eyes. All looking at me like I was lunch, and perhaps I was, but I like to believe that I’m classier than that. I prefer to believe that I was at least a three cores dinner at a very expensive restaurant, but maybe I was just delusional. It wouldn't be the first time that someone had told me that. Heaven forbid that they ever found out that I was a Zombie Queen, they'd flip their lid. 
    "Francois?" I would meekly whisper. "They don't want to hurt me do they?' At this point, Francois would try and be supportive, but it wouldn't sound convincing. Or perhaps he would whisper for me to run, that he could hold them back long enough for me to get to safety. He would sacrifice himself so that I might live. How noble.
    I would gladly run, being too scared to do anything else. Saving Francois would be the last thing on my mind, besides if they were Zombie Squirrels they would be more interested in me than they would be in him. Because he was a Zombie, and I don’t think that they would be very interested in eating him. And if they were it was really his own loss, he should have thought about that before he went and tried to save me. Not that I wouldn't be happy that he had saved me, but I would always look back and think it was rather stupid of him to do so.
    Luckily, the squirrels would have no interest in Francois at all for two reasons. One because he was a Zombie and there for inedible to them. Two he was not what any squirrel in their right minds would call attractive. Squirrels were a lousy judge of character anyway, so I didn't really care what they thought about Francois. He was a sweetheart and I would be glad to have him defending me against all of the evil Zombie squirrels. This still wouldn't stop me from running away, but would be thinking very brave and surviving thoughts at his as I did, which is what really what matters. Francois would want me to live on anyways.
    The whole thing practically had me in tears rolling on the floor of my hotel room. That's where Francois found me, in throws of laughter on the floor. He looked like he was going to shit a brick. His hand was on his sword, ready to pull it out and defend me if necessary. Instead I bet he was thinking that he would be the one needing protection.
    "Zombie squirrels.' I panted, trying to explain things to Francois, but that didn't seem to cover it. I would have to tell him the whole thing for him to even find the minutest bit of humor in it. "We were camping, and there were.' I couldn’t get a full sentence out due to the fact that when I started to tell Francois the story, it brought back the memories and I started to laugh all over again. 
    "Lucy? Are you alright? Should I call for Mark?" He was obviously trying to figure out what was so funny, and maybe mark could be some help with that. I didn't think mark would find it any funnier than Francois had, so I shook my head, which was all I could manage at that point. 
    I was no longer close to tears; they were streaming down my face. Francois was kneeling next to me, his fingers on my throat. His fingers were cold against my neck and that did a bit to sober me up, but I was still giggling. The images were still fresh in my mind and Francois' worried face did nothing to help that. It looked just like I had pictured it, all concerned and shit. That made me laugh a little harder. I think Francois thought that I couldn't take the pressure and had finally snapped. Maybe this was true, but his face was too perfect. 
    "Your face." I tried to tell him, but all that did was make Francois bring his hands to his own face like that would fix it. "It's just like I imagined it would be." I took in a gasp of air so I could finish what I was trying to say. "When you were protecting me from Zombie Squirrels." Francois still looked confused, but not so concerned.
    "Zombie squirrels?' he asked. I nodded.
    "They were trying to eat me." I said and continued to giggle. Francois looked like he was still considering going to get Mark, but then he must have looked out the window and noticed the time.
    "Are you packed yet?" Francois must have figured out that he wasn't ever going to make sense of anything I said, so he changed topics. That was a step away from thinking that I had cracked, so I went with it. I nodded. I had finished right before the idea of Zombie squirrels had hit me. It had occurred to me, at this point, that there couldn't be Zombie squirrels because that must mean that the horses we had been riding were Zombies too, and they hadn't tried to eat me yet, so I assumed that they weren't. "I'll bring your bag down then. You can join us after you've had a moment to collect yourself." Francois said after a moment.
    It did take me a minute to collect myself, and by collect I mean that I had to calm myself down enough that I could get up off of the floor and walk down stairs. I was still giggling, but even that was under control enough so that I could breathe regularly. Then I stumbled down the stairs to meet everybody before Francois could tell them that I belonged in a mental institution. Mostly, because maybe I did belong there. 
    "Hey." I said, mostly composed by now. Enough to talk without gasping for air.
    "Hello." Mark smiled. Obviously Francois didn't tell them about my earlier breakdown. Francois himself was busy trying my bag to the pack horse, making a a point not to look at me. This might have been a good thing because I probably would have broken into laughter again.
    We left the hotel and started to head to the south. It was going to be a long ride, and having learned another thing that was useful, I put my headphones in and turned on some tunes. Making sure Mark didn't catch on and make me take them off, I nodded and made agreeing noises every in a while so that he thought I was listening. At some point Francois must have caught on to what was happening because he stopped answering me questions after the third one I asked him to repeat.
    "Sorry, Francois." I said and paused the music that was playing from inside my pocket. "I didn't quite catch that." This was when he would repeat the question at a slightly elevated volume. I would smile, or make the correct facial expression, and answer.
    The country side was beautiful, but I had no interest in what anyone was saying. Let me enjoy my trees and shit in peace! I did take me headphones out once while we were riding, but this was more of a political thing that a politeness thing. We had ridden up on a pack of Werewolves that were traveling through Zombie Land, and I guess this wasn't anything new because Mark didn't seem to be phased. I had to talk to them once one of the Werewolves recognized me.
    Francois helped me off Sugar and I shook hands with both of the alphas, Elise and Sam. They were charming people and we talked for a while before Francois insisted that we had to leave so that we could reach shelter before dark. Damn, that boy really didn't want to sleep outside. He helped me back onto my horse, and after saying goodbye to the Wolf pack, I put my headphones back in. Vivaldi went so nicely with the scenery.
    The rest of the trip was uneventful, and when we got back to the palace I rushed to get back home and ready for school the next day. It was around nine when I got home, but my mom didn't ask any questions. I would have blamed it on Francois if she had, saying that he had asked me to meet him in the library after school so he could work on a paper for some class while I did my math. It was his fault that I was late with the whole trip thing going a little longer then we had expected and all. Francois wouldn't mind that much if I blamed him anyways, not that he was here to defend himself. 

 When I woke up there was the welcoming aroma of oatmeal coming from somewhere in my room. That struck me as odd for a moment because my mom hated it when I ate in my bed, and then I realized where I was. I had woken up to the sound of the door opening, and when I opened my eyes Francois was standing there with a tray of food. That’s where the smell was coming from.
    "We have to leave shortly." Francois said and set the tray down by my feet. "Get dressed and I'll meet you outside."
    I grumbled but got out of bed when Francois left. I pulled on some clothes, ran a brush through my hair, and ate breakfast. When I was done with breakfast I threw my dirty clothes back into my bag in case some maid got the great idea to wash my clothes while I was out. I then opened the door and almost walked right into Francois. When he had said that he would meet me outside I thought he had meant by the stables or downstairs. Not outside my door, being a creeper.
    "Good morning." Francois was almost cheery. Oh god, he was a morning person. I muttered something. "Was breakfast good?"
    "Yeah." It was fine, mostly because I didn't like oatmeal, but I didn’t have the heart to complain right now.
    Francois led me down to where the others were all waiting for me, they all had plates in front of them and that's when I realized why François had brought mine to my room. They had been eating people. The thought still grossed me out, but I carefully kept that off of my face. It wouldn't due to question the very fact that kept them alive in front of a whole bunch of Zombies because even if Francois wanted to there was no way he could keep me safe from all of them. And I have a strange aversion to dying, or coming close to dying really. Any sort of pain really is something to be avoided in my book really.
    Today we were going to see the timber industry of the north. I guess it was one of the Zombies biggest exports and Mark thought it would be educational to show it to me, but obviously he forgot that I lived in Minnesota and I knew my way around a god damned tree. I've watched a lumber jack competition for Pete’s sake. But I didn’t complain and went along with the game plan that had been presented to me as we started getting on our horses this morning.
    We were wondering around a heavily wooded area, one that looked like it could have been cut right out of the Minnesota north, and I was taking in the scenery. I've always liked being in forests, they were so calm but something bad could be lurking around the corner. Not that you'd ever know it by the way I avoided camping at home. I didn't like to sleep outside, but I could commune with nature when I wanted to. It was a really nice day to be outside too. Too cold for bugs, but warm enough where I didn't even need a jacket to be comfortable outside.
    Mark told me that we were starting to get into the logging area and soon I was seeing little log cabins among the trees. It was like some kind of Laura Wilder thing. Cute and picturesque. It wasn't long after that, that I started to hear the sound of axes and saws. It wasn't really loud but the din of it all blocked out any of the bird noises that I might have heard. We got to a hitching post and tied our horses there. Mark wanted me to meet some guy named Derik. He was the head lumber jack here. I felt like a third grader on a field trip. Everyone felt the need to point out the obvious and tell me little things that I never needed to know. Joy, the one time they're willing to give me information, it's not information that I want and or need. 
    Francois was the only one being quiet, but I was thinking that this was because that he was looking out for people who were trying to hurt me. It was his job after all, so I was kind of glad that he was doing it. He still wore the sword that I had seen him carrying when we had gone to wheel and deal with the Vampires. I wondered if it was the sword that he had dueled Emile with. That had failed him and let him die. Oh god, don't let him fail when my life was on the line.     
    We walked a few feet more and then I saw this huge bear of a man pulling on a saw cutting through this massive tree that dwarfed even him all by himself. It was like he was a one man tree processing machine. I stood in awe for a moment before Mark walked up and announced us.  Derik turned around and smiled at us. Everyone in Zombie Land was very smile, I had started to notice. It totally didn't fit, but nothing here seemed to fit anymore to me. 
    "Your Majesty." Derik greeted me. 
    "Lucy, please." it was still a little weird for me to think of my self as any form of royalty. I could be considered a drama queen sometimes, but nothing more than that. 
    "I don't think that I should be calling you that. I'm just a lowly lumber jack, and that's okay with me." He almost sounded like he was defending his profession.
    "You sleep all night and work all day." I can't believe that I could I got through that without laughing. It was a major Monty Python reference, but it seemed like I was the only one that got that. My dad would have been proud. He loves Monty Python and could still identify several of the guys even now that they were all old and shit. 
    "Yes." Derik looked happy that I seemed to understand the life of a lumberjack. I had no clue what went on in the life of a lumberjack, but there was no reason to let him know that. Let him think that I was completely understanding of the ways of the lumberjack. Let him think that I had read Zen and the Art of Tree Chopping. 
    "Good. Hard workers are always appreciated." I smiled back at Derik. We talked for a while longer, mostly about the tree trade of Zombie Land and Mark asking him all the questions that he obviously thought that I should be asking.
    It was a few hours after lunch I finally started to hear my stomach growl and Mark suggested that we go and get lunch. I was more than glad to oblige, but Derik declined our offer to join us for lunch. We headed back to the hotel to grab some food.
    Once there we sat down in the little restaurant that we had eaten supper in the night before and once again someone brought us food. It smelt really good. The food was a white bread sandwich with some ham, or at least I was praying it was ham, and some yellow cheese. It was one of the best things that I had eaten in a while, bar none. 
    After lunch, I went to go take a nap for two reasons. One, my ass was still on fire because of all the riding I had done over the last two days. Two, I was tired as all get out because I had been going like the energizer bunny for the last two days. The nap felt amazing and when I woke up, I took a bath. That was a little strange too, because it was still so old school for me. 
    Tomorrow we would be leaving for the mines way up north. I was told it might get a little chilly, but being a Minnesota girl born and bred I could deal with that. It was the whole, let’s walk around in the dark cave for hours on end listening to mark ask stupid questions to try and educate me. This was no longer like one of those elementary school fieldtrip; it was more like a bad family vacation. With the weird uncle that was constantly asking questions that he found absolutely fascinating, but everyone else found irritating. I loved Mark, but he asked a lot of dumb questions that I already knew the answers to. 
    I didn't really think about it too much, instead I hung around in my room reading. This would have been relaxing if not for the constant feeling of someone watching me all of the time. It was starting to get hard being alone when I knew that there was someone watching me all the time. I just didn't thinking I was gong to be able to live with this for much longer. It was so god damn aggravating! It was like having Francois hanging outside of your door all night long making sure that no one kills you in your bed. 
    Eventually I fell asleep without going downstairs for dinner. Lunch had been pretty good, but I had been too lazy to get out of bed to go and eat, that and my book was just getting good. It kind of went that way; I gave up things like eating and sleeping, sometimes even bathing, for reading. It wasn't that I was addicted, because I could stop anytime I wanted to, I just didn't want to stop. Reading helped me get through the monotony of my everyday life, not that it was so monotonous anymore. 
    As I started to slip into unconsciousness, I began to wonder if Erica was wondering what had happened to me. Or if she just assumed that I couldn't wait much longer and got my ass down here without waiting for her. She still wouldn't know where I was now though, no way for her to. We had left without sending her anything and Nemus and Nancy weren't going to be any help. In the morning I would write Erica and Antony a letter and send that to them so that Erica wouldn't be too worried. I was writing more letters than I ever had in my life down here. Letters were just another one of the old fashioned things that Zombie Land seemed to favor.
    Around eleven at night, I heard a soft knock on my door. I got up to open it, tripping over my bag on the way there. 
    "Who is it?' I called through the door, unwilling to open it for anyone not in my traveling party. 
    "Francois. I brought you some food. You didn't come down for dinner." It was Francois; I could have recognized his voice anywhere. 
    "One minutes." I called back, my fingers not quite working right and I fumbled for the thumb lock and the slider. Once that was open I opened the door and invited Francois inside. It was nice not to be alone again. I could feel Steve's eyes on me even as I slept, and it was giving me nightmares.
    "Here." Francois offered me a tray of bread, cheese, and a cup cake. It had pink frosting and it was so unlike something that I could see Francois bringing me to eat. He would bring a glass of water and some buttered bread in my mind. Nothing frou-frou like a cupcake.  I ate down on the edge of the bed while I explained to Francois that I was just too lazy to get out of bed to get something to eat. He looked at me like I was insane, but I just shrugged it off. That wasn't the first time I had ever gotten that look and it surely wouldn't be the last. 
    The cupcake must have been the single most delectable thing that I have ever eaten in my life. The lunch that I had been served earlier today was in total eclipse compared to this. I could have cried to the perfection of it. Pink wasn't really my color, but it didn't matter the moment it touched my tongue. If angels could bake, this is what it would taste like. 
    I'm pretty sure that Francois was still talking to me while I was eating this, but I was too busy enjoying my desert to listen. He would have to repeat it after I was done eating. Francois was giving me another one of those looks that questioned my sanity when I popped the last bite in to my mouth. Popped it like some sort of drug that I would be instantly addicted to. This would be my very reason to get out of bed in the morning. My reason to live, to breath, to carry on.
    "Are we done making strange noises as we eat a cupcake now?" Francois asked me. Had I been making noises? That certainly hadn't been my intention, and it was slightly embarrassing. I usually reserved my noises and faces for only those who had known me for a few years. How awkward to be making them in front of Francois. I say them, referring to noises and faces, because one usually went right along with the other.
    "Yeah. I'm cool." I tried to play it off like it was no big deal, but I was pretty sure that I was blushing. This was even more embarrassing than making the noises in the first place. "What were you saying?"
    "I was just telling you about the plans for tomorrow. We'll be leaving a little earlier than today. I'll wake you up and bring you something to eat. You should also pack your bags in the morning. We won't be coming back this way if you forget anything." Francois was saying this all in the manner of someone that had repeated the same things a few times already and was kind of sick of saying it. It wasn't my fault that he had been saying it while I was busy concentrating on the cupcake instead of him! He should have known better than talk while I was enjoying something more delicious than the sound of his voice. I wondered if he would be hurt at all by me thinking that. I hoped that I wasn't just flattering myself to think that Francois didn't hate me completely. That would suck just a little bit.
    After that Francois left, and I went back to sleep. I wish I didn't have to be alone, but I couldn't bring myself to ask Francois to stay. Steve wasn't going to kill me tonight, so I would just have to put up with his staring. Eventually, I was going to snap, but I could get through tonight, and tomorrow I wouldn't have to be alone very much at all. Perhaps I could even convince Stella that she should stay in my room tomorrow night where ever we stayed. Some subtle hints dropped to Mark and Francois and she wouldn't have a choice if I had to.
    Yes, it might be low, but I was getting desperate. Steve was really freaking me out and I couldn't live like this. Not in the constant fear that he was going to kill me. Not with knowing he was always watching me no matter locked doors and curtained windows. I never thought that anyone would ever want to kill me. In fact, I thought I was in favor with the people of Zombie Land. Having stopped a war and put down a rebellion without any blood shed should really boost my standings in the polls, so who the hell would want to kill me?
    I was just giving myself a headache by thinking about this; I would never figure it out until they tried something. Assuming that the person who was giving Steve orders had to be close by when the go word was given. It's not like Steve was getting mail or anything, and no one but Mark and Francois knew that he was here. Hope against hope, Mark and Francois had a plan for this. I really didn't want to die, not now at least.
    That night was one of the shittiest nights of sleep I have ever gotten. I woke up every fifteen minutes from a nightmare about Steve killing me in some awful way. Francois and Mark tried to help, but they couldn't do anything because I was trapped in a glass box. The next morning I was up before the sun, writing a letter to Erica and Antony.
    It was mostly for Erica, but to be polite I added Antony's name to the letter and used the plural you. Much of the letter wasn't anything he would understand, so it wouldn't hurt to have him read it. In the letter I wrote an overview of our travel plans and a description of what I had done so far. Some vague glitter bomb references were made, but nothing too weird. I rally wished I could just text Erica and tell her what was happening, but that wouldn't work. My phone didn't get reception down here; I had already tried before I started to write my letter.
    Francois was surprised that I was already up when he walked into my room carrying a tray of what looked to be oatmeal. I tried not to wrinkle my nose at it as Francois set it down in front of me on the desk.
    "Sleep well?' He asked.
    "Not really." There was no use in lying about it. Anyone could have seen by the dark circles under my eyes that I had slept horribly last night.
    "Steve?" Francois sounded vaguely pissed off when he said it. Nothing big, but his voice was a little tight as he said Steve's name.
    "Yeah." I nodded and started in on my oatmeal. My head was stating to hurt and I reached into my bag to find some Tylenol. Luckily, I had thought a head and brought some with me. I must have known that it was going to be a bad trip.
    Francois stood in the room while I finished my meal and packed my bags. I searched under the bed to make sure that nothing had escaped under there. When everything seemed to be in order, I handed Francois my bag, and only because he insisted. We left the hotel, Mark handing in the keys, Francois going to get the horses, and Stella and I waiting in the courtyard because we were women. How sexist.

T he rest of the week passed in a blur of sameness, but when Friday came I was ready to make plans with Erica, but she told me she already had them. With Antony. I spent the night home alone watching bad made for TV. movies. I fell asleep on the sofa in the middle of a bad lifetime movie, the only thing that was worth watching on at this point.
    The next day around nine, I woke up and went to check my e-mail. I instead ended up having a three hour conversation with Erica about her night with Antony. Since the summery will be shorter than recounting the entire three hour conversation, we're going to go with that.
    She said that on Thursday Antony had asked her if she was busy on Friday. At that point she told him that she wasn't busy. He had then blushed slightly and asked her if she wanted to have dinner with him. It was kinda cute that Antony was all shy and shit. He didn't have to be though, he was damn fine. I laughed when Erica told me that she thought that Antony was "damn fine" because it wasn't something that I could here her saying. 
    Antony met her at the entrance of the Big Fucking Hole and walked her to his personal house. Not some big castle like the Zombies has, but more like a huge house that he lived in alone. I guess that each vampire pretty much has their own house to live in because they don't like to put a huge value in the social class of a person. Which I found to be way cool. But I'm a forward thinker like that.
    Once I got over the fact that Erica totally got the better end of this deal, the vampires being the more modern of the two, she continued on with the details of her date. There Antony made Erica dinner. From scratch. By himself. How sweet. It was Spanish, so I was kinda right about him being from Latin decent. He made pisto manchego, horchata de chufas, and creme catalana. I'm not really sure what all of that was, but according to Erica it was all really good. He even let her set the table and light all the candles he had set out for their candle lit dinner. Which I found really cool, because you don't get old time romance like that from guys today. They more so bring you to some cookie cutter restaurant and then to some dumb romantic comedy movie that neither of you really like, but they think they'll get laid if they take you to a movie that you like, or that's what I've gathered from movies and the conversations I listen in on coming from people who actually go out.
    After that they sat around the table talking, getting to know each other, and all that other lovey dovey shit. At that time Erica spent most of her time lighting and blowing out the candle that Antony had set on the middle of the table. And Antony was totally okay with that, which told me more that anything else that Antony was a good guy. I guess he had planed this whole thing so he and Erica could spend more time together and et to know each other. He thought that they hadn't had much time together since this whole deal went down. It was really nice of his to do that.
    There was a lot of gushing on Erica's part, and she totally deserved to have that, but after a few hours of it, I was fed up. That and I was still in exhale because the ghost thing. Yes, Francois had come everyday and given me a progress report, but it wasn't the same. I hadn't gotten to talk to Mark or Stella all week, and considering I was used to talking to them everyday, I was having with drawl. I missed everybody. I even missed arguing with nemus. Which was totally insane, but that place had become so entwined with who I was that it was tough giving it up. Francois told me that they were working on the problem, so I could go back as soon as possible, but they weren't having much luck with it. He also was reassuring me that everybody missed me just as much as I missed them. 
    Francois and I were sitting in the office working through some math homework when he told me that the next day I could go visit everybody in Zombie Land. He said that they weren't getting anywhere and there was no reason for them to keep me away any longer. I was so happy that I could have kissed Francois, but I didn't. That would have been crossing the line. I did give him a hug though, because I was just that damn happy. I asked Francois if that meant he was going to set up my tour of my country. He sighed and nodded again. I hugged him again.
    The next day I didn't even wait for Erica after school, I had to go down the Big Fucking Hole and see everybody. I practically ran all the way down there and into the Counsel room. Everybody was already there when I rushed in, finalizing travel plans for me by the looks of it. Stella stood up and hugged me, telling me how much she had missed me and that I had left one of my sticks of eyeliner down here. After that Mark gave me a hug too. It was a short one, but it still reassured me that at least some of the Counsel didn't hate me. Francois stood up, but nemus and Nancy didn't bother. They obviously had been hoping to keep me away longer than I had been.
    The glitter had been washed off the walls, but I had a feeling that Nemus had done that without even asking anybody. Everything else was the same though. And everything seemed to be just the way I left it. No one had committed genocide or imposed a seriously devastating tax, so it seemed that I was worrying about nothing when I couldn't have been doing anything anyways.
    I looked at the maps lying on the table with tons of little red pins in it. It was assumed that these were places that they were going to take me. Zombie Land was huge too. There were mountains and forests and lakes and shit. Just like a normal map of a normal place, but it seemed to just not fit with what was happening down here. It was a whole other dimension down here, so I don’t know why I didn't expect to find that kind of stuff down here, but I imagined the Zombie realm to be more of swamps and wastelands. You know, full of fog and horror movie worthy, but once again, I was completely off base when it came to all things Zombie. 
    Francois and Mark were talking about what the better mode of transportation was, horse or car. Mark was arguing that, from horse back, I could see more of the country side. Francois was arguing that it would be easier to keep me safe in the car. But I had a feeling that Mark did not want to drive this entire time, and Francois had a thing about horses. I had no opinion in the matter so I sat down in my chair and listened to the arguing, even though it was obvious that they both wanted me to end the discussion with a discoing. 
    It was finally decided that we would take horses, because Mark had a point about where they were going to fill up the tank in the middle of nowhere. This was not America people, most of the population either walked or rode something to where ever they were going to go. This was fine with me, even though I knew my ass was going to hurt for days on end during and after this trip was done. 
    The people who would be joining me were Stella, Mark, and Francois. Nemus and Nancy didn't take us up on the offer we had made then, and I had a feeling that Francois and Mark were kind of glad about that. I was kind of glad too. No one wanted a party pooper on our little vacation. I was only in the Counsel room for around fifteen minutes when Mark sent me to pack my bags. He told me that we would be gone around a month. IT seemed like a long time, but then I remembered the six of the map, and I didn't really want to be rushed around to see things. I wanted to take time and appreciate them.
    The first place Francois told me that we were going was to the northern forests, which was sort of by where the Dead Fetus rebellions were. Things had calmed down now, Mark reassured me, but I still didn't really believe him, even though I knew Francois wouldn't be here if he didn't believe that the trouble was over. After that we would go up to the mines where the actually fighting had taken place. Then we would start south again, stopping in a few places that Mark thought that I should see and to see a few people he thought that I should meet. I didn't really care about these things; I just thought that I should maybe see what was outside of the castle. 
    Francois stopped by my room to see if I was packed and to take my bags out top the pack horse about a half hour after I had left the Counsel room. It was sweet of him, but I could have carried the one bag I had shoved all of my clothes in just fine by myself. We were walking down the hall way when Francois started to ask me questions, which was weird because I had always been the one doing the questioning before.
    "Do you still feel like someone is watching you?" He asked out of the blue.
    "Yeah, sometimes." I shrugged. I was kind of getting used to the paranoia thing now that I knew that I wasn't going out of my head.
    "You'll have to tell me if it starts to hurt you." 
    "I will." We were silent for a moment after that, but then Francois started to ask questions again.
    "Do you ride horses?" 
    "No. I have, but they just follow the leader. I never took lessons when I was little." 
    "Oh. Why's that?" Obviously Francois was confused on how I could have never learned horseback riding, since everyone n his time must have learned.
    "I was afraid of anything bigger than a dog." I told him honestly. "And I had no desire to parade around like that when I did get over my fear." 
    "Strange." He paused for a moment, hopefully thinking about how he was going to keep me from falling off my horse. "We'll have to put you on a pack horse then." He sighed, like this was terribly embarrassing.
    "I guess we will.' 
    "Or you could ride with someone else." He offered. A loaded question. I declined. 
    "I don't really want to be that close to someone for as long as we will be riding." I elaborated. 
    Francois laughed at me, again. It made me feel really good about myself.  I just loved it when people laughed at me. 
    In the stables Mark hooked me up with a nice mare that was used to being a pack horse, but she seemed to like me just fine. That was kinda a relief, because even though I had told Francois that I was no longer afraid of anything bigger than a dog, I lied just a little bit. I wasn't afraid of them, per say, but they did make me nervous. Mark told me that the mare's name was Sugar, which made sense considering that she was an off with color. She had some brown spots on her, but I just figured that was brown sugar.
    We left around noon and by the time we got to the place that we were going to stay, it was almost dark and my ass hurt more than it had ever hurt before. I guess that’s what you get for riding around on a horse for the entire day. None of the others seemed to have this problem, so I didn't bring it up. I didn't need another reason for people to laugh at me. I went into the little building and stood in a large hotel reception area type of thing. Francois and Mark were up at the desk while Stella and I had just entered.
    A few minutes later, Mark came over and handed us the keys to our rooms. When I say hotel key most people probably think about a little credit card thing that you slid through the door to make it open, but this was and honest to god key. With little teeth and everything. It was a little weird for me to have this old fashion brass key in my hand and think "hotel", but I got over it and went to bath. 
    After riding all day long I was filthy. The scenery was very pretty and I wouldn't have changed anything for the world, but riding along dirt roads when they’re dry just gets you covered in grime. Unfortunately, when I got to my room, Francois was already there, doing security detail. That was kind of bothersome, but what could I do? Kick him out when he was trying to save my life? Not likely? Instead I waited for him to finish going around the room, checking things out, and then I hauled my bad and threw it onto the bed. Taking out clean clothes out I went into the bathroom, where I was relieved to see that they had running water, and ran a bath. They didn't have a shower, which was a little strange for me because I haven't taken a bath since I was little. Sure, I had used the bathroom when I had dyed my hair at home, but that was just the tap. 
    I climbed into the bath and the water started to turn a dingy color, which kind of grossed me out. I washed my hair and then got out, the water a nice dark brown-ish grey color. It was really bad how dirty I was, I wondered if I smelt. Absently, I put on some deodorant, to get rid of any smells, and threw on some jeans and a t-shirt, Oh, black t-shirts, what a plethora of sins you cover up. I almost felt human again, and then I put on some socks and shoes. 
    I never knew how far a pair of shoes makes you feel above a pig. Because that had been the only difference between us a few minutes ago. A few minutes a go we had both been covered in dirt, we were both outside, but I had been wearing shoes. TAKE THAT PIG! All right, I might have been exaggerating just a little bit, because there had obviously been some other differences that made up for all of our similarities, but still. I had felt like a pig, and there for the differences had gotten less important the dirtier I had gotten.
    Downstairs everyone was waiting for me to come down and eat. They had even held off getting any food, which made me feel bad because I didn't really expect them to do that for me. These guys were way to nice for their own, some day someone not as nice as me was going to come along and take advantage. 
    "Sorry guys." I smiled and sat down at the table they had all gathered around. "I was really gross." Not to mention that I had a bruise on my ass the size of Ohio, but there was no way I was going to bring that up in front of Mark and Francois. I might bring it up to Stella maybe, but only because she was a girl and totally awesome. "You didn't have to wait for me." I wasn't going to be mean about it, but maybe I should start breaking all these manners these kids have had beaten into them.
    "It wasn't a problem." Mark smiled. Obviously everyone else had bathed too, because they were all in different clothes. "We just got down here ourselves."
    That's when the waiter, or whoever, came by and started to set down food. They hadn't waited for me, they had just ordered for me. I hoped that they were going to keep it warm for me if I hadn't showed yet, but I didn't stay on that too long because whatever they had set down in front of me smelt really good. Nothing like home cooking after a long day of travel. That and it would be a break from all the fruit that I ate down here. There was break and some sort of soup. I had come to trust Mark enough that there wouldn't be any human remains in this soup. As I picked up my spoon, I realized that this was the first time that I had ever seen any of the Zombies eat anything. I looked over at what was in front of them, but it looked exactly like that was in front of me. Hopefully, it wasn't though because I knew what they needed to survive.
    I cringed a little bit and started with the bread instead. Working hard to get the image of what the soup was made out of out of my head, I started to list every song I could think of that was recorded before 1985. That always worked for all the other gross images that people lodged in between my ears. It worked for this too. Soon, I was so busy chatting with my table mates that I wasn't even thinking what I was putting in my mouth. I was so into whatever we had been talking about I was barely aware that I was eating soup. In fact I was a little shocked when I looked down and the soup was all gone. Had we really been talking that long? Looking out the window, I noticed that I couldn't even see out of it because it was so dark. Yes, we had been talking that long.
    I yawned and everybody turned to look at me like they had just realized themselves how late it was. Getting out of my chair I excused myself from the table and the conversation to go to bed. Francois stood up and pushed in his chair, saying that he ought to get to bed also. We walked upstairs together and I found that Francois' room was on the same stretch of hallway as mine was. Francois walked me all the way to my door and then pointed out his own.
    "Don't hesitate to come get me if you need anything." He said and opened my door for me. It was a little strange that he should have a key, but in a way it also made sense. Like, what if I couldn't get out of my room to get him? Him having a key meant that he could get in to save me. I stepped inside the frame and turned to close it. "Keep the door locked." Francois offered me that last piece of advice and then left. I closed the door; more than a little freaked out, and locked it. I always locked the door when I slept. Most people called me weird and told me it was a fire hazard, but I just didn't want to get out of my room if I were ever to sleep walk. 
    Yes, I was afraid of being hit by a car because I was sleepwalking. It was just another one of my irrational fears. Irrational because I don't actually sleep walk, well to my knowledge. No one had ever told me I did, and I have never woken up somewhere with no recollection of how I got there. And if I ever did wake up some place else I would probably go with multi-personality disorder before sleep walking. 
    Also, the lock would prevent any lazy thieves from breaking into my room. These lazy thieves were mostly known as my brother and parents. They like to come into my room and dig around. Mostly for movies I have down there, or so they say, but I don't like when people go through my shit. 
    The room that I was staying in was very nice. The bed was nice and plush and the pillows were just right. I hadn't even noticed any of this shit when I had been in here the first time, mostly because I was in a hurry, and mostly because I didn't care. I expected hotels to be ugly and had just stopped looking at what decorated them. It had the same old world charm as everything else did in Zombie Land.  That was all I really cared about at this point, the bed and how comfortable it was. Not like some other hotel beds I had slept in. God, I hated when you got a rock hard mattress and the front desk refused to bring up more pillows.